Friday, January 13, 2012
New Year's resolutions huh?
The notion of "This is the year I..." fill in the blank is ridiculous. If there is something that you see in yourself that needs some help, it isn't the year to do it. It is the day to do it. I mean, come on. People have been screwing off their lives for 364 days and decide it's time for a change? Mike said it best...
Now is the time. When I hear talk about New Year's resolutions, I see crackheads. Sitting there on January 2nd with a crack pipe in their hand, like, "next year I'm quitting crack". Ain't gonna happen. If you wanna do it, then do it now. Or overweight women eating like eight brownies, "Next year, I'm gonna lose some weight". Hey. Tubby. If you wanna drop some pounds, then put the brownie down.
Look, I'm not trying to be mean here. But if you want to improve, then there's no time like the present. Figure out what it is you want to do and do it. If you have a weakness for hookers, don't wait until trickin one last time. This could be the one that gives you the clap. Shut that ho down and find a nice girl with no self respect to do all those nasty things you want her to do. And if she inexplicably doesn't want to talk to you again, just take it in stride and don't question your decision to hang with girls not on the stroll. It can only end one way when you're talking about hookers. And that's identity theft at the hands of a Russian ex patriot who has the goods on you and won't let it go until your life savings is in his and Sergey's hands. Think about it for a minute before you throw your life away.